Being a Man, as St. Joseph Exemplifies

This morning, I attended the Misa de Galleo in Ateneo Grade School chapel since the Grade One community is one of the sponsors.  I’m on my third day this year and hoping to make it till the 9^th.

The priest’s take on today’s gospel was insightful. When normally, it would either be Mama Mary or Baby Jesus who would be highlighted, he focused instead on St. Joseph.  He started by sharing how last night, he had an interview with a young couple set to take the sacrament of the Holy Matrimony.  He pointed out how the excitement and anticipation that both feel for the occasion was very apparent.  He noted that this could very well be how St Joseph felt at the prospect of marrying Mary, only to find out that Mary is already pregnant.

The priest painted a “good” person in Joseph in the latter's opting to just “quietly” divorce Mary.  What the priest did not point out, but what I was made to think of, was that in those times, women like Mary would be executed -- stoned to death.  

Being impregnated prior to marriage (and in this case, by someone else), is an unimaginable crime at that time.  If Joseph was not a good man; if he had been short-sighted and so egoistic, he could have looked at Mary’s circumstance as an insult to his being a man.  It would have angered him.  Nope, it could have ENRAGED him and justify in his mind the act of getting her PUNISHED for what she did.  But apparently, even in his time when “gender equality” is something alien and unheard of, Joseph had a strong sense of what is right and wrong.  Even before he “got explained to” by the angel, he had fully decided on his own to deal with the matter quietly.  He had chosen not to go by the “popular” way of shaming and sentencing to death “women of that sort.”  I wonder now if, in his goodness and obvious full of wisdom, Joseph ever had that as a concept -- “women of that sort.”  Probably not.  Most likely, he was beyond such stereo-typing.  His choices and actions then spoke as much. 

Obviously, Joseph was so far advanced for a man of his time.  A lot of the “modern men” these days could learn a lot from him in this aspect:  learn how to go deep inside of them and heed wisdom’s reasoning, instead of letting their ego dictate their actions; learn how to empathize with others’ feelings, particularly that of the women in their lives, rather than think of no one but themselves.  Here’s something for the men to think about. 

I’m currently raising a son, my firstborn.  Here’s praying I will be able to raise him well.  Raising him is something that Tatay and I take sooooo seriously.  That is why we go through lengths of holding “rites of passage” for him or of marking significant milestones of his life, and opening him up to a lot of opportunities.  But, we are only human as well.  We have several roles to fulfill other than being parents.  While we certainly try so hard, we also have several shortcomings. 

Personally, to me, raising a son is quite a challenge.  I have to acknowledge that as a woman, there are things about being a male that is really beyond my ken and full understanding.  While I can empathize and be loving, not being a man myself could leave me entirely clueless on certain things. But at least having covered the loving part and the full intention of helping him become a sensitive, loving, good man, I think, I’m about half-way there :)