Bantyan Island, Cebu (added more pictures)

Pre-script: I've been wanting to post this entry for the longest time. Not to mention, I've been itching to have the chance to write and reflect but never really had the time to. Immediately following the Cebu trip, I had but one week to prepare for an important training. The week after that, I implemented the training. A week after that, I'm busy preparing for Baby's first birthday! Imagine that. To cut it short, Baby's birthday have been satisfyingly concluded (thanks to the support and love of Candy, Dane and Jeni love u guys. And Bolo too of course and the rest of the family)

I've had a training in Cebu last week of October. It coincided with the MFPI Mid-year Congress. It broke my heart to tell Bolo that he would have to forgo attending the latter. Even at the last minute we were looking for a substitute who could possibly act as Baby's "yaya" while we were in Cebu. I begged Mama to go but she said she could not, owing to a seminar they will be having at school. In the end, we hastily arranged for Bolo's ticket and that of Baby.


At the Davao airport Baby is clowning around as usual while we were waiting for our plane. There's no containing him these days. He had to be up and about.


Still clowning around.


Bb: Nanay, put me down, I wanted to walk around!

It meant eating up at our savings again. But there never really was any hesitation for Bolo and I. To us, savings or not, Baby's welfare is all that matters. It's a good thing though that God truly provided for this trip (as usual, He never did fail me... Thank you Father God). I had a chance at a documentation job and it gave us enough to buy Bolo's plane ticket, some pocket money and allowance for a side trip hehehe Truly, when God bestows blessings, it overflows :)


Baby: Nanay, see me making pa-cute hehehe At the Cebu airport. Bolo feeds Baby while we were waiting for our ride to the hotel.

Even at the last minute Bolo and I were quite hesitant about going on a sidetrip. I was pretty excited about Bantayan. It was supposed to be mine and Bolo's "honeymoon destination" but work and then the pregnancy got in the way. So we had to postpone it for another year. Our anniversary have come and gone. Instead of going to Bantayan, the opportunity to go to Legazpi presented itself so off we went there instead. It wasn't even for a leisure trip but work. And our stay in Legazpi saw Bolo being cooped up in the hotel, taking care of Baby and me being too busy with the training and some take-on work to truly notice we were in a new place. We did appreciate the fact that we were given the opportunity to tour Legazpi on our free day though. I've already posted the pictures of that trip here already.

Back to Bantayan. On our stay in Cebu, there was a brewing typhoon somewhere in the north. And Bantayan being at the north most tip of Cebu, it looked as if the odds are against us. Bantayan, by the way, is four hours away from Cebu City by bus and another hour of ferry-ride from mainland Cebu Island. If it had just been Bolo and I, typhoon or not, it would not matter to us. We would still give it a shot even if it meant we might not be able to board the ferry because of the typhoon. To us, we just might get lucky and be given the clear weather over at Bantayan. However, having Baby meant some hesitation. Of course, we couldn't just risk it. We have his well-being and safety to consider.

But anyway, (I really love to linger at the details huh? Before going on to the meat of the story hehehe sorry. I just love to lay down the details to get them over and done with. And besides, details such as this is really pretty much a part of the experience, if one would think about it...) given the title of this entry, I guess one can deduce that we were indeed able to go to Bantayan hehehe We did, in the company of Juliet -- a PLSD (what my training was about) point person who turned out to be a mountaineer too.

As I said I was on a training in Cebu. And not only that, Ate Jean and I are slaving over some proposal too. So on my last night in Cebu, I did not sleep at all. After the training, I helped Bolo packed our stuff. There were the training materials and equipment that have to be taken cared of and stowed while we will be on our trip so we took care of that first. Then, we packed our clothes. The dirty ones and those we will not be wearing anymore went to the trolley and another bag. That will be stowed along with the training stuff. Our "Bantayan" clothes -- shorts and swim wear -- and that we will be wearing on our trip back to Davao went to a Backpack. Baby's sterilizer, bottles, bowl, spoon and milk went to another.

We were packing when Gladys and Geian arrived -- two of my pamangkins in Cebu. I was so busy I was not even able to squeeze in some time to visit them. So they visited me instead. It was unfortunate that Baby was already asleep when they came...

After packing, Ate Jean and I went down to the lobby (it's the only place in the hotel that had bright lights on) to work on the proposal. Upon Bolo's advice, I showered and changed into my trip attire already. It was a good idea considering at 3 AM he, Juliet and Baby emerged from the elevator adjacent to where I'm sitting all packed and ready to go. We had to catch the 4 AM bus bound for Hagnaya where we will catch the ferry for Bantayan. Ate Jean and I hastily wrapped up everything, making sure I had the files saved to my flash disk. I would have to look for an internet cafe at Bantayan to email the files back to the office. Yeah, work again while on a vacation. I'm not complaining though.

We had to take a taxi for the northbound terminal. Upon reaching there, we made a wrong decision of not taking the Ceres ride. That would have been more comfortable. But there was no one to ask as all of us have never been to Bantayan at all. All that we knew was that it is important that we get to Hagnayan on time to catch the first ferry for the island.

It did not help that it was pre-todos los santos. Many, it seems, were bound for Bantayan or the municipalities along the way. The bus was jam packed. Most of the passengers have flowers with them and some big, tin cans of biscuits. It reminded me that we have to enjoy the little time we will be spending at Bantayan since we had to catch our plane ride back to home to make it for the Nov. 1 celebration.

I was really tired from the training, not to mention the lack of sleep so I was asleep most of the way. At one point I woke up to receive a call from Te Jean as there were some concerns with the participants who were still at the hotel. That's when Bolo and I discussed we were compromising Baby somewhat. It was not a comfortable ride. But Bolo and I are trying to make Baby as comfortable as possible. By the looks of it, he is not feeling any discomfort at all still Bolo and I grew sober. We vowed we won't do any travelling anytime soon. At least not in those conditions.

At 7:30 AM we reached Hagnaya. We had to wait awhile before the offices of the ferries open to buy our tickets. There were two options -- to go by the fast craft or the slow boat. The former proved more expensive but we took it because of the time factor. Still, it took as some time to be on our way since we had to wait for the Mayor of Sta. Fe who is also taking the ferry. It was quite a delay I did not relish experiencing. I was growing impatient by the minute but there was no choice but to sit it out. Once the ferry was underway, I slept along with Baby.


On board the ferry.

It was a good hour before we docked at Sta. Fe. While we were at the ferry terminal in Hagnaya, we were already asking some of the passengers there as to a preferred resort in which to stay. No one really gave us a straight reply so we settled to a place recommended by Renee. She, Bambie, Suzette and some of the guys have been to Bantayan also recently. We were not able to go with them since I was in Cagayan for some work at that time.

We stayed at the Marlin's Place. It was a big room. The beds were tiny though but Bolo, Baby and I managed to share one bed. The other bed went to Juliet. I would have wanted to nap awhile but Bolo was eager to be up and about already. He engaged the services of a tricycle that would take us around the island. The one at the resort recommended some places for us to see. Some were quite at a distance from the resort but he urged us to see them. So, we just changed into shorts and off we went.

First stop was Bantayan proper. It was quite at a distance from Sta. Fe where we are staying. Bolo directed the driver to head straight to the market. We intended to buy some crabs for breakfast hehehe Actually, one of the reasons why we went to Bantayan was because we heard that we could buy crabs at 10 pesos a kilo hehe imagine that. Well, it wasn't really just at 10 pesos but we got it cheap just the same. Bolo bought a kilo, went to one of the nearby bar-b-q stalls and had it cooked there. To Juliet's delight, we found out that it wasn't chicken bbqs being lined in front of the stall but "pague" bbqs. She eagerly told us how it is considered a delicacy in Pangasinan where she is from. She told us too that the reason why it is such a treat in Pangasinan because it is noted for its therapeutic properties. She told us it does wonder for the digestive system. That was enough to convince me that we should order some too.

Bolo left us momentarily to scout for Ukay2x. After awhile, he arrived while the crabs are about done -- empty-handed. He said there wasn't any good finds. We were halfway through our feast of sea crabs ("lambay"), fish bbq and pague bbqs when a lady selling another type of cooked crabs came along. They were bigger than "lambay" and their outer shell looked a lot sturdier... We asked how much she is selling them for. She replied twenty bucks for three. I looked at our half-finished feast and told Bolo, three is fine. I had my back turned to the lady. So I did not see her hand Bolo three large "necklaces" of crabs. Each "lei" has about ten average-sized crabs. When Bolo laid it in front of me I was stupefied hehehe.

It was really a bad thing we were not able to take any pictures then. It should have been documented how our table was filled with a mountain-like pile of crabs. I guess we were very much intent on the feast that we forgot about taking pictures. Haaay, what a picture it must have made. Haaay too late...

Of course between the four of us -- we urged the driver to eat with us too -- it was close to impossible to consume the whole thing. So we had them packed. They will have to do for dinner.

After our feast, off we went. First stop was the St. Peter and Paul Church of Bantayan which is several centuries old church. It was beautiful. And I've been around and seen lots of old churches already...


St. Peter and Paul Church, Bantayan


The church's door


Stained glass window


The altar.


Upclose


Father and son clowning around with the church in the background

After the church, we proceeded directly to Kota Park in the municipality of Madredejos. It was quite far but I was thankful we chose to go there. On the way, Bolo and Baby slept. I came close to sleeping myself but I was the one holding Baby so...


The walkway at Kota Park


Family picture at Kota Park


The Kota Park


Baby holding on to a pre-war canon missle weighing over a ton. Believe me, Bolo and I tried lifting it to no avail...


Bb: Nanay put me down

After Kota Park, we were eager to go back to the resort to finally take a dip in the sea. It was a humid afternoon and our excursion left us all sweaty and thirsty. Getting back at Bantayan proper, I scouted for an internet cafe so I could email the files to the office. I was lucky to have found one. I managed to catch Candy and Sean over at YM. Couldn't resist teasing them about my being in Bantayan hehehe

We stopped at a nearby Ukay2x before proceeding to the resort. It was fun. We were able to buy Janin some sweater that is Indian inspired - really suitable for Baby's Birhtday party. We found a Tiffany jacket for her too which looked brand new and still in good condition. We were also able to buy Baby some Ralph Lauren Sweats. Really nice.

Off to the beach!!!!

After that it was off the beach for us!!! Truly heavenly :) We just changed into our swimwears and off we went. Baby had some moments in the sand. Bolo and I just enjoyed watching him. I feared he would put a handful of sand in his mouth but he did not. Instead, he enjoyed touching the sand for a full thirty minutes. He languished in it, played with it in his hand... At one point he swam in it... After a while, as most babies do, he did manage to put a mouthful in his hand before Bolo and I could prevent it.

It was a treat watching Baby play. Oh well, even when he is asleep, I enjoy the moment just by watching him. It must really be like that for parents. It's as if every nuances of one's Baby is heaven-sent designed to be enjoyed and savored...

Baby: Look Nanay, I have sand in my hand...


Baby: Is that the sea out there Nanay? Baby looking much like a beach model hehehe


Baby: I think I'll practice swimming here first Nanay


Baby: Nanay, come and get me. I think I'm now ready for the sea...


Tatay: Hmm... many sand on your head right here..


Finally enjoying the water...


With Ate Juliet. Bb: Nanay, cramps... huhuhu


Playing around with Tatay...


Mother and Son


Nanay: Okay, are your eyes close now? Bb: Hehe you can close them if you want but I ain't closing mine... hehehe


Bb: Tatay, can I sleep on your back?


Family Picture...


Baby: Brr... Nanay, I think I just had my first taste of sea water...Hmm.. make that the second. I just remembered drinking a mouthful over at Samal...


Bb: Tatay, the water tastes salty hehehe


Ah.. Isn't this baby really something?

The water was really nice and the sand is comparable to Boracay's fine white sand... Hmm.. which had me thinking... Maybe our next stop should be Boracay hehehe I just hope more blessings will come in so we will be able to do just that... :)

Cool!

Isn't this cool? I'm actually logging in this entry at Mactan Airport while waiting for my flight back home to Davao. They have this wifi service from Globe. Only 15 mins but I've seen others taking much longer than that...

Ah, I have loooooooots of pictures I will be uploading here soon... Been to Bantayan Island for a side trip... hmm looks like my time is almost up. better wrap this up... ah, kends, in case ur reading this, i have ur masareal hehehe

Retro-Entry: On Books

October 19, 2006
10:00 P.M.

I'm actually happy today. We just came in from outside. I'm happy because we were able to buy some books for Baby earlier. We bought two -- A Bible Pop-Up Book on Noah and Bright and Early Books' "The Ear Book." (Baby already has his Dr. Seuss' The Foot Book) It's amazing really how the excitement I'm feeling at the moment is the same as I have always felt in the past whenever I was able to buy some really good books for myself.

I remember being over the moon when I finally managed to buy Coelho's "By the River Piedra..." I was crazy over Coelho long before the multitudes have discovered him so finding his books were quite a feat in those days. So finding one then definitely tops it for me. I could even picture myself smiling from ear to ear as I clutched the book close to me... Must have looked crazy to others at that time hehehe

I felt happy earlier as I read to Baby the Ear Book and see him nodding his head to the rythm I'm creating. Haaay I swear by "Bright and Early"... (Especially Dr. Seuss') The words are arranged in such a manner that they sound so good in one's ear... and most especially to Babies' also, judging from how Baby responds to the words he's hearing...

We actually went out to fix Bolo and Baby's plane ticket for Cebu. After that we grabbed some bite at Evergreen's Vege Kiosk (Baby is getting adept at eating Tofu hehehe) and decided to go home. When we passed by the Book Sale area, I knew I would have to do some browsing. This time, not for myself but for Baby. (Yeah, it's like that these days, not for myself.. almost always for Baby's).

I asked the attendant if they have any Dr. Seuss books and he told me down pat he doesn't know and that he had never seen one. Hmm... I could write another entry on how bookstore owners should hire attendants who love and breathe books. It's practically annoying to get answers like that you know...

Anyway, we already paid for the Pop-Up Book when I asked the cashier again if they have any Dr. Seuss and viola! She pointed me to the right direction. I knew we hardly had any spare money left but I went over to the section just the same and leafed through the book almost in reverence... The longing must have been written all over my face because when I started to walk away, Bee called me back and told me he had extra cash and could spare me the money I needed to buy the book. I could almost hug him right then and there. And so we bought the book. And I knew I must have grinned from ear to ear then and probably looked foolish but I couldn't care less. I was already looking forward to spending some reading moments with Baby. And we did have such moment earlier. I guess what really made me happy was knowing Bee appreciate the value of books also and share my desire to introduce my passion for it to our son...

I know it all really boils down to Baby's wanting to read or not when he's finally grown up. For sure, I wouldn't be forcing books down his throat if he doesn't want one. All I could do for the moment is to spend time with him and to share my passion for reading...

I love my son and I would love for him to grow up to have a passion for learning as much as I do. But, I could not force him to do things he might not have an interest for... I could only introduce to him the things I want to do... what my values are... and what I find worthwhile... It's up to him to pick up whatever suits him... But one thing's for sure though, I couldn't wait to get to know the person my son would turn out to be. I would love to know about the things he would value and what his preferences would be... But that could wait. For now, we could only hug him, spend time with him, cuddle him and show him how much we love him... Love you much Baby Bolo.

2006 Night Hunt

Team AMOC before the race


With Ric


What's this? model for the watch or the drink? :p


Another model for the energy drink... nah, won't do hehehe


Renee...


With Ric who lend us his car for the race... :)


Jay: Black necktie, boxing gloves, Durina Republic T-shirt... Skipping rope, frisbee... meron ako nito lahat sa bahay...


Bolo: Pix sa! :)


Hmm... have to make sure the poor thing's got to have air. Wawa fish :(


Hehehe really cute. The game required us to present a Jollibee crew in complete uniform. So Jay borrowed a neighbor's uniform and we asked Don2x to wear it for us bwahahaha Talk about ingenuity. One team really brought a crew along hehehe and he sat there for like an hour looking like a lost puppy hehehe joke lang po :(


Me: Jigger, check; Live gold fish, check; Superman action figure, check...


Hmm.. is it obvious that Bolo is just doing it for a pose? :p


Jay: Unsa pa ba kulang?


Jay: anong items ang nasa yo Ren? Bolo: Pix sa ta B


Me: Do we have the PROZAC capsule, Ren?
Renee: Nope, I don't have it with me...


With Daryl and Jong2x. See the Porcelain doll I'm holding? it's one of the items for the hunt.


Bolo: Im wearing the PMA Ring needed for the race! hehehe

This poster is one of the items required for us to submit. Haaay. We took a picture of it but no can do. It had to be in poster form.


And the checking begins...
Chicklet: cuff links?
Bolo: B, cufflinks raw..
Me: hmm... it's here somewhere...


Me: Ano yun? He-man Action Figure? Meron na ako rito, Sto. Niño dress, pwedeng ito muna ang i-check?

Retro-Entry: Holding Baby's Hand

I am very busy. I have tons of report to finish that I brought them even at home. But something happened yesterday with Baby that I wanted to write about…

Baby had a bad case of constipation yesterday. I know, constipation is hardly a “good” subject to write about but mothers who went through the same experience, I’m sure knows where I’m coming from. It’s one of the most horrifying things that could happen to a baby and to the parents too who are witnessing the whole thing.

I sat, stood, rocked back and forth, just to make sure that Baby is comfortable. He is crying so mournfully over my shoulder. I massaged his lower back, smoothen his hair, hug him, plant butterfly kisses all over his face just to make sure he’s feeling the connection. I wanted him to feel that while he may be going through some really unpleasant experience, he is definitely not on his own. Bolo and I agonized along with him. We both felt helpless. We did not know what to do. But we tried to help Baby as much as we could.

It must have pained him so – judging from his whimper and tears – but Baby did not stop pushing at all. All the time he leaned on to me, holding my hand as I held his. Bolo and I would have wanted to consult our Pedia as to what suppository to buy just to relieve Baby of the discomfort when suddenly Baby pushed successfully. It must have taken all of his might because he suddenly grew limp on me. My heart went out to him. My poor Baby. But pretty soon after that, he went back to his old self – happy and smiling.

I was made to think, someday, Baby will be facing hurdles of all sorts. In every stage of his life, there would be moments where he’ll be pained or undergoing some unpleasant experience. I shudder to think about it. I know if such a time would indeed come, it’ll be worse for Bolo and I too. Seeing Baby so pained had really been difficult for both of us. I know try as I might I could not fully protect Baby from pain… Come to think of it too, it’ll be unfair also if I’ll shield him from all of it. Pain is necessary for one’s growth. It is through it that one shapes his or her character… One thing is sure though, Bolo and I both realized Baby continued pushing even if it was too painful for him because he felt both our support… The experience taught us the lesson that though we may not be able to shield Baby from pain, we could still be there for him to lend a hand… and help him through the experience… Bolo and I are praying that we could be good parents to our son. We pray for wisdom and fortitude that we may be able to take good care of the life that God had entrusted in our care…

Baby's High Chair

I've been very busy lately that one time I've totally forgotten to eat. I came from a meeting for KATIG when I remembered I haven't had lunch yet. Huh! That was around 5 PM already, almost time for dinner. Bolo and Baby are at EDGE, visiting so I went there so we could have "dinner" together -- lunch in my case. We ate at Ahfat. Ordered some fried Tofu and Satemi. I would have wanted to have some crabs but Bolo's practicality prevailed. He told me we'd better buy some fresh ones from the market so we will have more for an equal sum of money. And so... what made the experience extra special was Baby's being able to sit in a high chair for the first time hehehe It really was fun.

Hmm... Baby's been everywhere from Marco Polo to our fave restos -- Gorio's and La Toscana but it's the first time he had ever been on an high chair. Those previous times, he had been too little to even sit by himself. We usually had his pram along or Bolo and I took turn eating and holding him. Ah, at one point too while we were in Ahfat, Baby got into a "drama" mode. When I would not hand to him the fork, he suddenly launched into a "tearless" wail. As in! It truly surprised me. I mean, at ten months! My Gad, at ten months he already knew how to get into a drama, tsk tsk. It was both fun and alarming an experience for me. Well, Baby looked real cute then that it really amused me. But it was alarming in the sense that I would prefer to have Baby voice out to me his concerns no matter how unpleasant it might be. I wouldn't want to have him resolve to any "drama" of sorts. Because.... I prefer that he and I be truthful to each other... Ah... but he and I will come to that. When he's a lot more older than he is now... I look forward to that day...


Bah! Looking Smug! hehehe


The twins ulit hehehe


Hmm... matigas ang ulo haaay


With the bib on, ready to eat...


Asus! The drama begins...


Bb: Tatay, I want my fork! huhuhu


Bb: Huhuhu I want the fork! Basta!


Bb: Haaay, no effect Nanay? Ok, i'll stop crying na

Traveling Baby

Last month, I had been to Cagayan de Oro for some business concerns. As expected, Baby tagged along too. Hmm... I think Baby's starting to get used to travelling already. One acquaintance in that recent trip pointed out to me that Baby would most likely grow up loving to move around a lot too. Hmm... well, his Tatay and I both are "wanderers," so I guess I shouldn't be surprise if Baby would indeed turn out to be one also... Well, I pray we will get to enjoy trips together in the near future... Right now, he's too young to really appreciate the experience. I look forward to the day when I would have to consult him which bed he prefers to sleep in or which resto he prefers to have his meals... But most of all I look forward to having him help me pack or come up with the itinerary for our trip. I look forward to having him hand to me a favorite pair of slippers or pajamas for me to pack... hehehe Ah... matagal pa ata yun. But for now, I really enjoy having baby around, having him in my life... Who wouldn't? When every trip I take these days is made special by seeing his beaming face looking up to me? Baby is truly such a joy to be with. He's such a happy Baby and I couldn't stop thanking God for it...


Ah my two "handsome" travelling "twin" companions hehehe


With Tita Loren :)

Kindred Soul

Once in a while you come across a kindred soul - one who share the same values as you, someone who share the same passion you have for certain things... This week, I came across a kindred soul. And it is a sobering experience. It's been a long time since I truly admired someone. But it sure felt... good? to have had the chance...

Life indeed is a journey and with the recent developments in my life, I'm feeling as if I'm finally at the stage wherein each steps matter. Not only once this week have I felt that I've been prepared for this experience... Ah, words escapes me... But I think my life took a sudden turn when someone really respectable told me to take my chances. As she said, I only have one life... How astute she is.

Bits and Pieces... Falling Into Place...

Sigh! There is so much I want to write and think about. I've been to Gen. San and Sarangani some time last month. Had several insights there. I wanted to write about it as soon as I came back but work got in the way. I've been in Cagayan last week, Candy and Dane came to visit last weekend... Bee quit his job even though it was a very difficult sacrifice for him to take... But he took it for our son... And not only that, he slid back to his old routine without any word... without any hint of grudge... I'm thinking if it had been me, I would have blabbed on and on about the sacrifice I'm making but not Bolo.... Something happened to Baby last Sunday that gave me a peek at how important it is for parents to be there for their children... And I'm actually in transition at the moment... I'm quitting my job for another... for an offer that came out of nowhere... Arrrgh I want to write about all of these things... But I have tons to do at work... things to put in order...Everything is falling into place... And awhile back I wondered -- God, how can You love me so? How can You take charge of my life and arrange it so beautifully when I hardly deserve it? Khublei Mo. Thank you, Abba.

Untitled

I was on my way to the office when I noticed that the lady who is walking in front of me is holding a baby with a harelip. The bad thing about it is that it was apparent that the cleft has infection. It looked to me like it had been operated on but just got infected.

My heart readily went out to the baby and the lady. I hesitated about moving on to where my office is located. I wanted to stop and talk to the lady, to ask her how she’s feeling about her baby and how she’s holding up. I wanted to know how she is and to learn about her experience. And yet I knew she would have thought me weird if I did just that. She might think I’m crazy or something.

Looking back now, I’m thinking, perhaps not. She might thank me even for the concern I’m showing. She’ll probably even appreciate having another soul to unburden her woes and worries to. But I have no way of knowing that for certain now. Because I did not act on my impulse. I paid more attention to what other people might say, etc, etc. That and on the fact that I was already late for work. And while I was thinking that, I also thought that maybe the lady was also in a hurry for some appointment herself and might just think me a bother…

But really, all I wanted then was to reach out and to tell her that here is someone who somewhat understands what she might be going through… Someone who feels for her… I understand because I’m a mother too…

For several days now, I’m having a lot of insights while I am spending some time with Baby. At one time I noted how happy it makes me feel every time Baby smiles back at me or every time I notices how he delights in every little discovery he has or little thing that catches his fancy.

It dawned on me that perhaps God is like that also – happy upon seeing us happy and that there must be nothing more important to Him than to make us happy. It occurred to me that considering how God feels more than we do, the way I feel for my son must be nothing compared to how He feels for us. So He must truly be ecstatic every time He sees us being happy or even by simply being content with the blessings He is bestowing upon us. This thought sobered me up for a while. It made me resolve to strive to keep that joyful countenance and sense of well-being despite some difficulties I might be undergoing because it will be one way of making my God happy.

Yesterday, Baby was quite in a playful mood when I arrived home from the office. He’s so full of energy these days despite being sick and all. We were both in bed – me resting from having accomplished a lot at work and him playing like a whirlwind, being at one part of the bed to the next.

At one time, he wriggled from my grasp to get off the bed, feet first unto the floor. That wasn’t the first time he did that so I wasn’t surprised anymore. Though, I still feel that brush of pride in noting how intelligent he seemed since he certainly maneuvered his way off the bed very carefully making sure that he goes down feet first and was so careful until his two feet are firmly planted onto the floor. He was on his own the whole time. I was just right where he is, quite ready to catch him should he fall, but quite beyond his reach also.

I tested Baby's sense of confidence. I repeatedly pointed out to him that his Nanay is not holding him at all and that he is on his own. He showed hesitation several times but mirth is more pronounced on his face than any hint of fear. Did I say fear? There was none at all hehehe

I watched in consternation as Baby gleefully held on to the bed sheet (luckily we had on at this time the slip-on type or he would have had the bed unclothed and fell on the floor) as he made his way through the whole full length of the bed. That’s what he did, slowly, he took tentative steps one over the other as he held on so firmly on the bed sheet. There were several times when he would hold out his other hand to me, as if urging me to hold him, assist him. I watched amused every time he would attempt to sit with one hand still holding on to the bed sheet. Obviously, he is fearful about falling but was getting tired already.

What’s really nice about the whole thing was that he was smiling the whole time. Every step he takes successfully, his face would light up as if he was pleased with himself. It seemed to me that he is very delighted with every learning he’s getting. He was definitely learning how to walk on his own. He continued with his antics until he reached his set of drawers that’s just beside the bed that house his shorts and nappies. That was when he showed double the mirth when he started pulling at the drawers. Ah, it was a heavenly moment. Looking back, I certainly feel privileged to have witnessed all that. Truly, parenthood has more of its share of rewards than “sacrifices.” If one would think about it.

When I finally laid him down to bed (against his will since he was still attempting to jump of the bed, this time head first huh!), I thought about how God must delight in us also every time we get to learn the set of lessons He intended for us to learn – this time, much more profound than just learning how to walk. These are lessons that are intended at teaching us to fly – be the best that we can be. These are the lessons that would help us achieve our full potential. I asked Him under my breath then what lesson is it I’m not getting until now? And whether does He still have the patience to wait for me and stand by me ready to catch me when I fall. I’m sure He does because unlike us mere mortals, His patience and love for us know no bounds.

Ah, at least this is one lesson I’ve learned a long time ago. It’s hard not to learn this early on. Specially when I see and feel His love sustaining me everyday even if there are times I do not acknowledge this at all. Thank you Father God, for everything. And now, for the gift of my son and the million delights being a wife and parenthood had bestowed upon me. I’ve already told You this before but I’ll never tire telling You again and again – you have painted such a wonderful tapestry for me – my life – all its hues whether dark or light are designed so perfectly that not only once have I felt so blessed to be alive. And, so loved by You.

Trade-In's

I still feel my calves protesting even when I traded in my pumps for flat sandals when I got home during lunchbreak. For a month now I’ve been having an affair with my newly acquired, strappy, two-and-a-half-inch high heels. Yeah I know. It hardly qualifies for a stiletto. But for someone who rarely wears any high-heeled shoes, continuing the affair for a month straight, is quite a feat already.

I’ve always cherished my legs and my calves. Nope, I don’t spend the whole day on a foot spa or rubbing on lotion or anything. In fact, if truth be told, I rarely put on lotion hehehe I guess eating vegetables has its advantages. Anyway, what I meant with cherishing is that I take real good care of my legs. I try not to put too much strain on them by shunning away from “very high” high-heels or wearing uncomfortable shoes. I had to! Mountaineering is my passion. Not to mention the fact that my life basically revolves around fun runs and races... If I don’t take care of my limbs, then it would be like robbing myself off these pleasures. No way!

Hmm…I don’t know what brought the “affair” on. Maybe I was on one of my whimsical moods. But for now, definitely, I’m calling the affair off indefinitely. I still value my limbs and I don’t see the point of subjecting myself to the aches I’m feeling at the moment. Sure, I still fancy looking real nice if I’m in an office get-up but I think I’ll achieve the same look if I wear one-and-a-half-inch shoes instead of much higher ones.

On a different note, Bolo and I traded our usual jogging-marketing-day for a lazy walk by the beach last Sunday. We woke up quite late due to some marathon we had the night before. Though we still want to go ahead with the marketing, we changed our minds when Mama pointed out Baby could benefit from some early morning sea breeze. His cough and fever had been going on for about a week then despite prescribed medications. And so we put on our rubber shoes and off we went. We had fun especially when we saw Baby’s beaming face as he walked on the beach and saw the waves closing in on us. It was a pity we did not have any camera with us then :)

Last night, I traded in the chance to watch “The Devil Wears Prada,” with “You, Me and Dupree.” I’m glad that I did. Hmm… will write more about it later. My son had to take priority hehehe

Baby's First Ride

Vynette Found Her Frog Prince =)

Finally, Vynette "Baki" (our affectionate monicker for the five of us including Ging, Evie, Cecile and I) tied the knot last September 2, 2006 =)

It was a happy ocassion but sad to say I was but just around towards the latter part of it :( I was asked to report to work to help finish a project proposal that's already in the bag. And since we have a new director in the office and a kind one at that, I did not have the heart to refuse. I did come early though at the office in the hopes that I would finish early and still be able to attend the wedding. In the end, I had to beg off and went to attend the reception -- what's left of it :(

I was supposed to have shared a few words for Vynette and Dino during the reception and for a month I have thought about what I'm going to say. Several things came to mind but in the end I settled with what my heart wanted to say. I wanted to tell her that I am happy for her. That having growing up with her (despited the distance later on) I have witnessed how she searched for that "perfect" relationship. Perfect in the sense that it'll be one where she will be afforded the same love and respect she will be giving. There had been close calls but it was never really "it." And now she has Dino by her side. I think whatever they have right now is worth all the wait. I think she had just found her Frog Prince, someone who could give her the love that she truly deserves. I'm so happy for you Baki. And I'm truly wishing for your happiness. May the family that you and Dino will be building may constitute everything that you wish and hope for to make up for all that u "missed" while growing up :) I'm praying for nothing less for you and for all of God's Blessings. Be happy and I love you:)

Ah... the bride and and pretty ones hehe and Evelyn's cute little Sean.

Marketing Day

I stood in the middle of the market and drank in the smells, the sights and the energy of the place. I could feel the whole place throbbing with a life of its own. Most of them there were individuals trying to make a living – some in a traditional, honest way, and for some, maybe in not so honest way (Bolo and I got ripped off last week. We paid for a kilo’s worth of fish only to find out we were given less than what we paid for.). For a moment I wondered what kind of lives do the people there have and live. What were the issues that they have to contend with everyday? What were their dramas? What were their stories? If I were to sit with them and exchange experiences, what would they tell me?

Bolo and I must have stood up somewhat in the crowd of people there because not only once have I felt and seen the stares being thrown our way. Maybe as I wondered about their lives, they were also probably wondering about our own. We probably looked fresh to them, naïve. Sure enough, Bolo and I often have to ask what kind of fish they are selling and how best to cook them. I knew we reeked of youth - being a young couple that we are. I wondered if we reminded them of how their marriages used to be – fresh and new; exciting and so full of expectations. Most of the people there looked resigned, the lines of acquiescence etched all over their faces. It’s as if they felt they have already seen all there is in life and is just living day by day as it comes to them. There was no element of fire in their eyes, no excitement and openness as to what else life may have for them around the corner… As I wished on them the fire that still lit my spirit, I wondered if some of them we’re also thinking that Bolo and I were fools who believe life is one exciting ride and is in for a big surprise.

Ah but these are grim thoughts. While the above observations may be true for some, there were also those who eagerly served us. Every time Bolo and I would ask if what we’re buying would be fine for a few months old baby, or for a lactating Mom, we would receive tips and suggestions and advice of all sorts. And all of them were being given sincerely, and whole-heartedly. As we made our way from the maze of stalls I felt myself energized somewhat, pensive and amazed at the amount of reflection I’m having from just being in the midst of all of that.

When Bolo and I found ourselves in the middle of the meat section, I grew dizzy and nauseated from the smells and the energy of the place. I may have only imagined it but the whole section reeked of decay to me. I knew the same could be said of the fish section but it was different there somewhat. Maybe because fish, even tuna, looked minute compared to the carcasses being butchered left and right at the meat section. Bolo pointed out to me at one time how “threatening” it is to be loitering around there seeing vendors yielding big carving knives and hooks.

Sundays have become a marketing day for Bolo and I. For two Sundays now, we have awoken up early to jog our way to the market and buy food stuff for the house. We lingered the most at the vegetable and fruit section. Ah and at the ukay-ukay too but rarely do we find anything worth buying there. Last Sunday, we had to walk back home since Bolo spent our last penny on some crabs after he found out I’ve been wanting some.

All in all it was a novel experience for me, something I could do again and again without tiring because I know it’s going to be a different experience every time. Life, in fact is like that. In truth, no every day is really the same. There may be times when life may prove to be one routine on top of the other – doing the same things all over again, everyday. But if one would really stop and reflect on it, life is one “heaven” of a ride. There are magical-moments, aha-moments, lurking in some corner or the other if only one knows where to look. No, it’s not even that. It’s the attitude really. If one expects life to be exciting and full of promise then that is the kind of life that he’ll find. If one looks at it differently, and see only the drudgery of it, then that's what he had to live with.

“To flit and fly and explore life’s many possibilities.” I remember writing that part in the personal credo I wrote perhaps four years ago. I still adhere to that until now even when life have already dished me quite a few unpleasant experiences. My life is not without its piece of bitter pill that I have to swallow on some days. Bolo and I, in fact are trying to work out some knot in our relationship at the moment – a very stubborn one at that. We have history and years of conditioning as an enemy. But we face it everyday. Work at it everyday. Everyday I’m learning more about what commitment really means. And there are times I don’t want to learn about its meaning at all hehehe But I stick around, albeit as an unwilling student at times because I know, it the end,the lesson I'll be learning would weigh much, much more than the drudgery I'm feeling.

Permanence

Ah my heart is currently breaking into pieces. I just got off the phone. Talked to Mama who happens to be at home visiting baby before she goes to work. I asked her if she found baby crying when she arrived because it is the first time that I left him alone with the new yaya. She told me he was not crying but that he looked really, really sad and would not even go near her.

The picture broke my heart. I could see it in my mind so clearly because while I was dressing up and putting on shoes I already saw Baby looking at me so longingly. He wasn’t crying at all, begging to be picked up like he used to do the past few days that the new yaya is around

Argjh, it’s really a physical pain, I want to reach out so much to Baby, comfort him, assure him that his Nanay would always be there for him, that I would not forsake him…

I find it ironic that Baby had to learn the lesson of “impermanence” from strangers. Bolo and I have always been adamant about handling with care baby’s emotional needs. When he was merely an infant, we would drop everything that we’re doing to readily pick him up when he’s crying just so he would feel secure. We spent a good deal of money when I’m on a travel so that he could tag along and not be separated from me. And then now, just when he had attached himself to his first yaya, she left him. Came two new ones (since they’re supposed to be packaged deal, it’s a long story) whom he did not take to at all. He would cry until I, his tatay or lola would get him. So even with the yaya’s around, Bolo and I, including Mama, still took turn being absent from work so that he could have some semblance of security until he gets used to his yaya. And now, they would leave again on Sunday for a job in a Carenderia which they prefer over working at home. Maybe they really don’t have that aptitude for babies and maybe that is also why Baby does not like them at all because he sensed that. Ah, my poor Baby.

I really hate the fact that it had to take strangers to do this to him. I’m contemplating about resigning from work to be with Baby. I just hope I have enough “sidelines” like documentation work to help tide over the expenses we have at home. I can’t have Bolo working on his own. And I don’t think we could really afford it either if it would only be him. Arrggh…I’m going home in a little while.