Dear Rod,
That day has come, hasn't it? But yes, you came when Nanay was less tired, with much more energy, with a little less responsibility... so I was able to write. Write tons of my moments with you.
I remember to be in a middle of writing a proposal and a thought of a shared earlier moment with you would crop up. I remember looking at my watch noting how I've worked solid hours enough. I'd tell myself, I'm due for a creative break and so I would write, document that very moment with you.
I remember writing with my head inclined to one side as I try to remember every nuance, every detail coz I want to preserve them for this very moment we have now, when our relationship would begin to change.
I used to be your hero, now more like the antagonist as I nag you endlessly about responsibilities and should's. Motherhood is a tough job, my love. There's always that careful balancing between simply being the soft, lenient, "loving," "always yes" Mom and then being firm about non-negotiables. Coz you see, I also have to make sure you are healthy, have enough sleep and is always choosing to be kind.
I still love you to bits, Rod even though our battles are quite epic these days. I know, as your Lola used to tell me when I was also in my teens... "You would understand one day when you're finally the parent why I have to be tough on you today. You would understand someday." And understood I did.
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