Saying Hello Again

Finally, here's a break in the "goodbye" posts. Dane's flight to Dubai was at 11:30 AM yesterday, Sunday. At around that time, I arrived at Paradise Island with Bolo, Baby and Janine to meet up with Candy and Durly. Yup, Durly and her family is in town for a vacation. They are going to be here for a week.

It's been what? 5 years, since Durly left for Manila? Maybe even more. I remember we had a Christmas-Party-cum-Despedida at their house in Mandug. Candy was still very much pregnant with Asia then, her second child. China was a mere toddler. Durly's daughter then -- Lei -- was I think barely 1 year old. Now all kids are grown. Durly now has a 3-year-old son and I have a son of my own. How time flies and how life evolves. It seems only yesterday when we would sit in the 2nd floor "stairwell" in Ateneo, exchanging notes and agonizing over our grades in Calculus. Now, we're all faced with a hurdle of a different sort -- that of married life and being full-fledged adults.

I remember one conversation I had with Candy over YM (yeah, conversations nowadays are coursed through YM and not over coffee and cake. there's just barely enough time left for such get-togethers. YM, on the other hand, are right in our own bedrooms... and err.. desk at the office hehehe). We were lamenting how this time, things like paying the bills, sustaining our family's needs, being in-charge with "adult" stuffs are no longer the concerns of our parents but our own. If before, we are always at the receiving end, now it is our turn to do the providing. And we're finding out how difficult it can be. Well, adulthood sure sucks hehehe

Come to think of it, it's funny how before we all can't wait to be adults. We always hated it when we could not do our own thing, we had to undergo the agony of having to ask permission only to be turned down by our parents. Little did we know that great responsibilities come with such "freedom" too. Looking back, I think I would give up to be a kid again and be free from all these worries hehehe

Baby just came in, dressed in his complete England jersey uniform and playfully handed to me his soccer ball. He turned to me with his ever-present beaming smile and "gurgled" something he only could understand. I guess God just delivered me a message right there hehehe So okay, I take that back, adulthood is not really that bad hehehe

But anyway, it sure was fun seeing Durly again. We are set to meet on Wednesday for a dinner get-together. Hopefully other classmates could get to join us =) Below are some of the pictures we had at Paradise.

Dane's Despedida

This blog is starting to be like a "saying goodbye" station for all my entries about close friends' sojourn to greener pastures. I refuse to think it has got something to do with the upcoming elections and what a joke it's turning out to be. I don't like to think everyone is assuming the country's got nothing but a bleak future up ahead and so the desire to jump ship while they still can... I don't like to think about that because that's an entirely different matter to muse about and should be a different entry altogether...

My clock reads, 1:51 AM. I'm sleepy and tired but I'm trying to get my brain to cool off as it is still very much awake...

Tonight's "despedida" took several days of planning and meeting with Candy. For Bolo and I it was such a big project since we are hosting it hehe Well, for all his participation I think Bolo really did take it too seriously. Why, he certainly "made a career" out of it.

The night before the big day, Bolo slept real late just to clean up around the house. Our freshly laundered clothes -- which practically takes forever to be folded up and kept in their respective station in our cabinets -- got tidied up and tucked away in a 3-hour record time. That's quite a feat alright considering how it is a common sight to walk in the second bedroom and see pile upon pile of clothes and clean blankets thrown casually over the bed. It had been a common practice of Bolo and I to sort out through the "rubbish" the things we needed to wear, iron them and let the rest lie where they are hehehe.

I'm not in the least proud of this but Bolo and I just don't have the time to deal with the matter hehehe Made to choose between spending time with Baby, the other hundred things to do around the house and that... I guess tidying laundered clothes takes the least priority.

Anyway, enough of the laundry hehehe I certainly am digressing here. My point is, Bolo certainly rolled up his sleeves and made Dane's despedida a very important project of his. He woke up early, did the marketing, mopped the floors, cooked the pasta (2 kinds at that) and the salsa, and prepared everything. (I really could not thank you enough B. Thank you so much for all the help and all the importance you've shown my friends.)

Moi? Well, I watched Baby who kept us awake the night before also because of a fever, did my work, and made a special video for Dane. Well, I had had my hands full also but of course it was nothing to all that Bolo did.

But it sure was a fun night. Knowing Dane, everything was light and well... funny. Half of me however was thinking, it'll probably a long time before I'll see these two good friends again... Even now as I sit here I can't help but be emotional about the whole thing. Especially when I remember all those times we spent with Dane and then eventually with Bong too.

Dane and Bong were our "wedding coordinators" and "pro bono" at that. Not only that, she had paid for my bouquet as well. "Kapalmuks " I sure am huh? hehehe Maybe this is also the reason why Bolo took everything seriously. After all, it's the least we can do...

When it was time for Baby's first birthday, Dane was there as well, helping me out in the planning... But yeah, Dane is such a generous person. As Candy would put it, she is very generous not just with money but even with her time...

Oh Dane, for sure we are really going to miss you. As it is, it all seems so surreal that you're finally going to leave us. It's making Candy and I really, really sad hehe We could have hugged you you know, earlier. But I guess we were never really the "showy" type. This may sound cheesy I know but we do love you and your leaving is something that is not quite that easy to accept :) I guess meeting up with college friends now wouldn't be the same without your sarcastic comments and jabs hehehe Sigh. Spending time with you guys and with Bong was something I've always looked forward to in the past. Because I'm sure I'll be spending the whole time laughing... I'm thankful that we had those moments... even that one time in Apo. Good luck friend. Hope to see you guys again real soon... But not so soon least we'll take you away from chasing all your dreams. Just don't take too long though. You're leaving some orphaned friends over here :) Here's giving you one, big, tight hug friend... We miss you already.

Chie-Chay

I sit here now with a heavy heart knowing I've set aside doing something really important again... What was the excuse? I was busy preparing for a training at work... I was overtaken by "familial obligations" yet again... Both "excuses" sound plausible enough to me... They are after all equally important. And yet, why do I feel so empty at the moment? Why do I feel as if I did not try my best hard enough to do that which needed to be done?

An old friend is on her way to the airport... to seek out greener pastures... perhaps to go chase her dreams and to find herself...

Luchie is a dear, old "kababata." We practically grew up together. I couldn't count the Christmases and the New Years we've spent crouching at their veranda or by their doorstep exchanging gifts and catching up on things. There were a few years of that spent lamenting about our old loves haha! At that time we were both trying our best to get over our...err... first loves :) We were so young then, so naive. We thought childhood flames are meant to last forever. What do we know about relationships then? Oh well, but they were "great" loves... so pure and innocent... Something that hinges on "magic" and "happily-ever-afters..."

Over the years, I guess we slowly drifted apart... We pursued different careers and each were equally time consuming. There were times we'd missed each other by mere days. I'll be in Manila just when she's about to go back to Davao. Or that she'd be in Iloilo or Cebu three weeks ahead of my own schedule... Yet, somehow, we have managed to keep in touch every now and then. Sometimes out of the blue, we'll text each other and arrange to do our "grocerying" together, or have both our hair done as we both share a hairdresser.

There was a time when I managed to tag her along during a weekend trip to Tudaya. It was a very tiring trek and something she is not used to doing at all -- riding on a truck loaded with vegetables, trudging through mud, even almost falling off a cliff (I still thank God and our angels for sparing her that fall upto now) -- but she gamely did all the things that my friends and I did.

I guess we really just stopped seeing each other that often when I had given birth to Baby. I rarely had enough time to go out then. And I suspect she had been busy with a "new" relationship at that time as well. I let her be... I could very well understand that part. I had also been real "preoccupied" during my three-year long relationship with Bolo.

When I learned that she is leaving, I had fully intended to spend some time with her if only to catch up a little and to give her the "Traveler's Prayer Book" I have been eying for some time at a local bookstore... I just felt that she needed it, although we haven't really had the chance to talk about how she is lately. Yet again, work and other things intervened... or so I try to tell myself to quell the heavy feeling I feel inside...

I know Luchie well, even if we don't get to talk that much lately. Without her detailing to me everything, I know from the little bits she told me, what she must have been going through the past year. And my heart reaches out to her. Right now I'm longing for the times when we were both so young and so idealistic, discussing about how life and relationships should be. I missed the times we would spend hours dissecting the works of Anne Rice and eventually that of Paolo Coelho... Life was so much simpler then, much less complicated...

So long Chichay :) I'm sure during those times we've spent talking we've never really realized that life would turn out to be the way it had now... Yet looking back, it wasn't really that bad huh? We turn out pretty okay... You and I had to beat some odds through college. I've seen how you worked so hard even if the demands of your work had started to become unbearable... So I'm sure there is nothing left but for you to reap on all the returns that is due you :) So never lose faith. I'm sure the best is yet to come. Good luck, friend. Am praying for you.

Spring Cleaning

It's 3:33 AM in my watch and here I am trying to unwind from all the work we had. Bolo and I cleaned up the "bodega" room. Needless to say, there were a lot of setting things in order and dusting up to do.

Well, seeing how the room now looks real tidy and livable -- enough that it could be offered as a guest room when relatives come over -- I think all our efforts have certainly paid off, being sleepless notwithstanding. Good thing tomorrow is a holiday so I could sleep till late in the morning hehehe

Tomorrow -- make that today -- is gonna be the the city's celebration of it's Charter Day. I think its 70th. I'm not sure though. Bolo's been very game about spending the entire day with us tomorrow. A part of me is hoping I could take some good pictures during tomorrow's grand parade but considering having to tag Baby along, I guess that is out of the question... Not real sorry though. These days, what's important to me is spending some quality time with Baby and Bolo. And it doesn't matter much where we spend it, as long as there's just the three of us enjoying each other's presence.

On that note, I remember musing a little while ago while I sat in the middle of the dust-infested, litter-everywhere room, how intoxicated I am with my present state of life. I realized, considering all that I've been doing lately, it seems my entire being is entirely centered on my being a Mom and a wife. Apparently, it would seem, everything else plays second fiddle.

Even my time for introspection revolves around the realities I'm sharing with my son and my other-"whole" (who ever coined the term -- other-half! Half indeed! Hmp! hehehe) Bah... that should not be so... While I love them both so much, I should not lose sight of the fact that all these are temporal in life... and these are attachments that could very well make me lose sight of far more deeper realities -- that above everything else, I am a soul... And I know exactly what that means...