Mayon in the Twilight

With the first day of training successfully concluded, Juliet, Te Mameng and I walked back to our hotel feeling content and just a little bit tired. The response of the participants was good. The weariness, more than anything else, was due to the lack of sleep (in order to catch the first flight) and the difficulty sleeping in a new place.

Back at our hotel, we deposited our things and traded our shoes for slippers. Then we trudged back where we came from to catch the jeep bound for Camalig. It took some time for the right jeep to come along that we had to ask some locals if we could indeed take a ride for Cagsawa there.

Yup, Cagsawa was the desired destination that day. Juliet and I had already been there. The visit was more for Ate Mameng’s benefit since it’s her first time in Legazpi.

As expected, having to commute takes so much time. We had to snake through the streets of Legazpi and Daraga before we reached the highway leading to Cagsawa.

It was already late afternoon. The whole experience reminded me so much of the time I went to Miag-ao Church in Iloilo when I was feeling apprehensive about the fading sunlight and how it would very much affect the pictures I wanted to take. This time though, I was feeling less apprehensive. Pictures or not, I am just thankful to have the chance to see Mt. Magayon (as the locals call it) again up close.

There was a point in the busy streets of Daraga when there was a break in the buildings and Mt. Mayon showed herself to us in her full glory. Ah, how beautiful she looked, how majestic.

We where already on the highway when the landscape changed drastically. The buildings and the structures gave way to a big expanse littered every now and then with dead, leafless trees and destroyed, abandoned houses.

Juliet turned to me and informed me that an entire barangay was totally wiped out during a typhoon that hit the province following the recent explosion of Mt. Mayon and we’re looking right at it.

The contrast leaped at me. And I could not help but note with irony how something as beautiful as Mt. Mayon could also be a source of so much destruction.

When we reached the corner of Cagsawa we alighted and began our walk towards the “park.” The place looked desolate in the fading light. What used to be a populous area is covered with mounds and mounds of black sand – lahar. We had to pass by several “mini-streams” and had to cross a shaky piece of coconut log over a raging river that wasn’t there before, in order to get to the ruins. The belfry still stood there but the church ruins where we had our pictures taken before could no longer be discerned from the piles of sand that covered it.

Most of the nearby structures – canteens, inns and big houses lie deserted with their caved-in roofs hanging at the rafters. With the darkness creeping all around us, everything started to feel a bit creepy. No, it’s not really that. More like, there was sadness in the air.

The first time I was at Cagsawa, it never occurred to me that I’m going to see it again in this state. A friend in Legazpi pointed out to me that what happened to Cagsawa now in a way corrects history. She said that the history books stated that the ruins in Cagsawa came to be because of a great explosion by Mt. Mayon sometime in the 1520’s. But with what happened recently, the experience pointed out that having the whole town wiped out was not caused by the explosion itself but the surge of water and deposits from Mayon following a ravaging typhoon. And she’s probably right. Amazing huh? Indeed, life is cyclical… History keeps repeating itself…

Legazpi is a special place for me. Not so much because of Mt. Mayon but because I have come to love the place for all it represents. I’ve encountered a lot of people through the work I do. But the “Albayons” to me are among the happiest people I’ve met. They just laugh more often and always have a joke or two to tell. I think this is a special trait, considering all the hardships that they had to go through every year, being ravished by typhoons every now and then.

If I would bank on my belief of the law of karma then I’d say I might be tied to Legazpi in some “karmic” sense because here I am, drawn to the place. Never did it occur to me that I’d be frequenting the place to render some service of sorts. And yet here I am…

Whatever it is then, I hope to get as much learning as I can from my work in Legazpi and from the people I meet there. As it is I am already learning that the human spirit is pretty much like Mt. Mayon in the twilight – that despite the fading light and the destruction all around you, one can still stand strong and majestic, conquering all storms that may ever come one’s way. Just as the people in Legazpi remain happy and content despite all the hardships they had to go through.

Those that I work with are “development workers” as well. In Legazpi, “development work” entails having to rush to the aide of those affected by typhoons, Mt. Mayon eruption, flash flood and having to deal with victims from wiped-out barangays. I could not imagine the anguish that they might face and how these people could leave their homes also affected by the calamities in order to help others. And despite all that they still remain happy persons, with healthy, joyful countenance.

It’s a reminder to me and my tendency to be upset when things don’t go my way. Lately, I have not been my best self. I have so much expectations of Bolo as a husband. And when he fell short of those expectations, I make sure that he knows about it. I also make his life hell for a while hehehe hmm.. somehow I’m often angry these days, sometimes, even a bit bitter. Yeah, so unlike me.

I think I certainly have difficulty adjusting to married life hehehe That’s the only reason I could think of for being this way these days. I guess all the responsibilities overwhelmed me.

Marriage, indeed , is such a daunting “state of life.” There are just far too many adjustments that one had to make. Oh, it’s not all hardships of course but somehow it’s the “hardships” that leave the best impression.

I pray to remain beautiful inside amidst everything I have to face these days… I pray for focus and clarity of thought. After all, Bolo is such a beautiful person really. He makes me laugh with his sincerity and his “innocence.” Actually, come to think of it, it’s not his fault really if I have such high expectations. It’s my problem not his. And to give him credit, Bolo indeed tries so hard just so he could give me my whim which is just childishness really. Blame all of that to my romantic inclinations and wanting to keep that burning even if our relationship had already evolved past that.

Come to think of it, what more could I ask? Bolo still sneak up to me bearing long-stemmed roses on his back on special occasions. He would come home wearing that sheepish smile on his face, being pleased with himself to have found me a real nice “ukay” blouse. He would cook for me and my friends and do it without shoving it to my face that I owe him big time for that (unilke me hehehe).

Oh, paying the bills, sometimes being short of cash, and not being able to buy the things I want, are “unpleasantries” of married life alright. But I just would have to remind myself constantly that they are not all there is to what Bolo and I have. There’s baby of course, who’s the consistent neutralizer. His smile is enough to wipe all worries away.